March 10, 2004
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Something occured to me the other day. I used to avoid looking people in the eyes. For quite a few years, I lived in the city. The general consensus is, if you look people in the eyes, it’s just asking for trouble. Beyond that, I’m just not that social. If you look someone in the eyes, it’s pretty much an invitation to come on over and be friendly. My habit is to avoid contact. I don’t want personal entanglements with strangers. And lastly, I always thought it was best to be non-confrontational. If you avoid looking a person in the eyes, they would feel superior and have no need to beat you down to make themselves feel superior. This I learned in highschool over a decade ago. Considering how brutally it was drummed into my head, it was a hard lesson to unlearn.
Lately I haven’t been avoiding eye contact. Surprisingly, people seem to respect me more for it. Well, most people. There’s still the idiots out there with superiority complexes, but the majority of people who I look in the eye seem to be grateful for the contact. Meeting their eyes also helps to make my points. As someone in retail, I’d say that looking someone in the eye helps to “make the sell,” whether it’s selling books, music, or dvds… or myself. People trust your opinion if you can look them in the eyes without flinching.
And I’ve come to realize that most people have really beautiful eyes.
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This week’s Ancient Whispers newsletter is on the subject of divination. The article and “craft” this week comes from the Tibetan Bulletin. It is a fascinating look at divination practices that most of us are probably not familiar with in Tibet. The jokes and cartoon also follow the theme of divination, and this week’s Sites of Interest covers a broad range of divination in the past and present.
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Some Sites of Interest
The Neo-Pagan Divination Archive & Occult Divination Archive
The Fortunetellers’ Club
Africa Divination: Mambila and others
Ancient Astrology and Divination on the Web
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This Pagan Week : March
Humor : The Major Arcana Crosses the Road
Article : Tibetan Art of Divination
Quote : General George S Patton
Craft of the Week : Varieties of Tibetan Divination: (Cont. from Article)
Humor : Bad News
Who’s Who in World Mythology : Ameretat
Quote : Foka Gomez
The Magi’s Garden : Catsfoot
Cartoon
Poem : Divination
Quote : Mark Twain
The Power of Stones : Boleite
Humor : Tarot Light Bulb Joke
A Dreamer’s Guide : Notary to Nuptials
Quote : Sacha Guitry
Previous Newsletters
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Comments (6)
Thats strange Though I am an extreme introvert I was taught to always look people in the eyes. But found through life that most people would avoid looking into mine and often thier first impression of me was one of apprehension and fear ( the fact I am well over Six foot and just over 300 lbs probably didn’t help either) any way I agree I love looking at eyes It is I would say the most attractive female feature as for “making the sell” just act with self confidance and people will think you know what you are doing even if you are clueless
the eyes are the window to the soul, i also fel uncomfotable when someone looks into my eyes, but im trying to force myslef to look in to other ppls eyes for business purposes like urself. Thats going to be my major when i go to college.
the short one
:Witchy: I avoid looking into people’s eyes until I realized it is a familial trait on my paternal side. This trait became more apparent when I was a substance abuse intake person and during a counseling class we had to video tape ourselves couseling. Ughhh. Painful yet eye-opening (pardon the pun). I have noticed that when I look most people in the eyes they avoid mine so I relapsed for a while. Now as a manager who has to train people in selling I am more aware of my own non eye movement trait and am back to that eye contact. However, because I work in an airport by the incoming international flights, some people of some cultures I do not give direct eye contact to- I try to be culturally aware.
:Medusa:
ink: :Reaper: :Sick: :Swami: :Karate: I’ll stop playing with the emoticons now! *lol*
I always used to look people in the eyes if I was talking to them but I’ve been told that it makes them feel uncomfortable (apparently my look is intimidating) so I stopped doing that. I only look into someone’s eyes if I want their undivided attention. If i get carried away in a long monologue I’ll look at the ceiling sometimes…
I ADORE this elephant. He is sooo cute. Anyhoo, yeah, I try to make myself look people in the eyes, but I find it so difficult, like I’m giving too much of myself away.
ink:
For me personally, when someone looks me in the eye when speaking to me or even just as a passing greeting, my inner respect for them jumps up notches.
I think a lot of it is truth. Liars rarely keep full eye contact. At least from my own experiences. Looking someone in the eye is like someone giving a firm handshake. Confidence exudes. :Egypt: