June 9, 2004

• Frustration…. grrr

  
  

  Something is wrong with my computer. It will not let me open any files from disk, so there will be no new comics and no new newsletter until the matter resolves itself… I’m hoping it resolves itself (once the Venus transit is past) because I can’t really afford to get my computer fixed and the mind boggles at the amount of email I might come back to if I had to send it out. No, I’m not popular, I just get mountains of spam.

  
  

  And my car is make some kind of weird knock when I go around a curve. Aside from that I need an oil change (three months ago according to the little sticker), and though I got new tires in January, the back right needs to be replaced. I suspected a leak after I got them, but the car shop said there wasn’t one. Now if there’s no leak, then why have I had to refill that tire and only that tire every month for the past five months?

  
  

  And it’s heading into that time of year when my allergies have me so completely exhausted that I have no patience to deal with any of my problems, let alone anyone else’s.

  
  

  Speaking of other people’s problems… My sister is sending her baby to stay with us for a week while she makes enough money to move back home. She’s a little leech, I swear. I half expect taking care of her baby will stretch into a month before she follows. She’s constantly going on about how supportive our family is (in contrast to her boyfriend’s), and yes we are, we’ve sent her money when she’s needed it despite the fact that we are basically “working poor.” And then she has to add that she’s given us money when we’ve asked… and I always refrain from asking when that was because honestly I have never asked her for a penny. My mother spent thousands of dollars to keep her out of jail for assaulting a police officer for goodness sake, and that’s thousands my mother doesn’t have. Luckily she cleans house for someone who agreed to give her the money in exchange for a year’s free housecleaning. My sister lives in a complete fantasy world. I just hope my nephew will grow up with a bit more awareness of reality.

  
  

  And then there’s my brother, who will also be coming home, early, from Jobcorp where he has been in training to be an electrician. From past experience, I know what will happen. Nothing. He won’t find something immediately, and so he’ll become frustrated, start vegging out on the sofa, and then give up. Play video games till 3 AM and sleep till 3 PM on the foldout sofa-bed in the living room and eat everything in the house.

  
  

  I want a new family. The only one I respect is my mother. Anyone want a little brother and sister? Fixer-uppers. Cheap. Or perhaps you’d rather adopt me? I’ve got issues, but nothing a loving and supportive home won’t fix. I’ve had all my shots! heh

  
  

  I’m so depressed. I should mention the dream I had about joining a circus… They were trying to sign me up at the same time everyone else was trying to get out. Symbolic, yes?

  
  

  Edit next day….

  
  

  The Venus transit is done. I woke up this morning feeling refreshed. That’s something that hasn’t happened in a while. Was it a result of Venus finally finishing its passage across the sun? Who knows…

  
  

  I deleted and reloaded Windows ME and Microsoft Word to my computer. Hopefully that will fix the problems I’ve been having. Of course I haven’t tried to see if it worked yet because it freezes up my whole system and I have to reboot and wait while it tells me I shut down improperly, blah blah blah. Evil thing.

  
  

  I really don’t want to go into work frustrated because my computer decided to be stubborn, so I guess I’ll let my attempt at fixing the problem “settle” for a day before trying it out. Heh, I’m so superstitious… as if a computer needs to “settle.” But tomorrow I have off from work. I can afford to be frustrated tomorrow without worrying that I’ll carry a pi$$y attitude with me to work.

  
  

  I had a barely remembered dream about time travel last night. The only detail I can really recall is that I was back in feudal England and suffering from amnesia.

  • 2:05 pm
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