January 3, 2004

• Wow, I don’t believe I stayed offline till nightfall. Of course, I knew I’d be on eventually. I can’t go a day without reading my comics and Xanga, and you can’t imagine the glut of email I would face if I didn’t signon at least once.

  
  

  What do I do when I have the first whole Saturday off in three months? Why catch up on sleep of course. Gah, I’m getting old. Scary. Or not. It’s not like they have any Good Saturday morning cartoons any more. Gone are the days when I would even tape a couple hours to watch when I got home from work. Today’s cartoons are so blatantly commercials produced in an effort to sell merchandise, it’s not even funny. It’s like they don’t even pretend to be entertainment any more. What do you want to bet they come out with a Middle Earth themed cartoon in a year or so?

  
  

  I complained about not having dreams lately and so I get three in two days. Last night I had some creature features, that’s for sure.

  
  

  The second involved an alien which was terrorizing a highrise. It looked like a brain in a jar with a saucer shaped body and spidery robotic limbs. It fed on the light from lightbulbs and demanded daily tribute or it would kill people. Everyone (about half dozen people I didn’t know) was barracaded behind the furniture and I suggested the added protection of a sheet over the furniture. (Cause you know a furniture fort isn’t complete without a blanket over top.)

  
  

  The alien came for its tribute, and I poked one of those long floor lamps at it. You could see the light grow dimmer as it neared the robo-space monster. Then I got the bright idea that if I swung the lamp at the alien, I could smash the bulb before the alien could drain the electricity and electrocute it. Well, that didn’t work, and the alien got pi$$ed, turning red and jittery.

  
  

  Thinking fast, I picked up a cushy chair and mashed the alien in its saucer, but the damage started to undo itself and I could tell it was only a matter of time before the alien rose again. I ran over and stomped it to bits, then kicked it off the balcony.

  
  

  Everyone was angry of course, cause we all knew it would be back. So we climbed from one balcony to another until we finally reached one balcony where a giant suitcase with a ragged whole in the side sat. Well, for some reason we knew this to be a superhero’s escape tunnel, reasoning that superheroes are rich and can do pretty much whatever they like. We all started crawling through the hole though I had to make it just a bit bigger for some of the people.

  
  

  I remembered the first dream this morning… but now I’ve forgotten everything but some reference to a donkey on roller skates… Maybe I’ll remember it later. I’d forgotten the second till we went food shopping earlier and hairbands jogged my memory. Don’t ask me how cause I have no idea. They just did.

  • 5:32 pm
  • 3 Comments